Going Home

How often do we actually stop to think about the meaning of the words that trickle out of our mouths? I was contemplating this last week and I find myself thinking about it again tonight. Words… well, a single word really… usually taken for granted, seemingly insignificant, thrown around nonchalantly… But on certain occasions it's a word I dread to say or hear because it results in distress, pain, sadness, etc… so, what's the word I'm talking about? Goodbye. It is what it is; plain and simple. Aside from its casual use, when you really stop to think about it, a goodbye is pretty final. It doesn't exactly leave room for negotiation. And you never know when it may be your last.

This evening we received a phone call from my best friend Heather's mom… Heather's grandpa died yesterday morning after battling cancer. I guess I'm still in shock because to be honest with you, I didn't even know he was that sick. I saw Heather on Friday but she didn't mention anything about him being in the hospital. I know I should feel sad - Heather's my best friend and Grandpa Lord's been like my grandpa in a way since I lost my last grandparent at the age of 10 - but I'm not feeling anything. I want to cry but nothing's coming out. I know I should've called her as soon as I found out but I don't know what to say to her. I'm hoping that something will come to me as I write this… all I know for sure is that because of this situation I find myself once again thinking about all the times that I've said goodbye to people; significant people in my life especially. (Some that perhaps I have said goodbye to too hastily…)

When I say goodbye to Grandpa Lord at his memorial service it's going to be for good; it's going to be forever. But then again, I guess it's not going to be at all. I mean, Grandpa Lord has finally gone home to the house of his and our Heavenly Father. He's not suffering or in pain anymore. Praise God that his cancer is finally gone. There must have been such an awesome party that day up in heaven to celebrate his homecoming. I can't help but smile thinking about it. Our time on earth is so short compared to the eternity we'll spend with God in heaven.

I've decided that when I finally go home to be with my Father, I want people to party it up. There should be music and heck, even some dancing (hah, I can't dance at all but that shouldn't stop other people from doing it!). And there should be cake!! Lots of cake!! I want everyone to remember the good times (uh, the bad times too I guess) and laugh a lot because my life will certainly overflow with innumerable funny stories and happy memories. I want the room to be filled with love and peace of mind because people will know that I've gone to a better place; that I've gone home.

Before I go, I'm reminded of a recent sermon I heard at Southridge (my St. Kit's church) that discussed the reality of death as it is described in Ecclesiastes 9. I don't have my sermon notes here in Mississauga so I'll post them in the new year but in the meantime I can leave you with a few of the pastor's thoughts. The pastor kindly reminded us that although death is inevitable, we have two things to look forward to - a lifetime full of love, purpose, and blessings and of course the promise of eternal life with God. So make the most of your time here while keeping an eye focused on what awaits you in Heaven.

I'm going to call Heather now… I still don't know what I'm going to say to her…

Be blessed. Keep looking up.